I honestly don't know what to write right now but I did tell a good friend I would write soon. So here you have it. Me, feeling my worst but wanting so deeply to feel the best. Therefore, I will say nothing more of negativity but only of hope, happiness and love. A little update, Rick has completed his first class much earlier than the rest of the class. They gave the class until September to complete the course and well...Rick completed it a few weeks ago. He started in June. He had worked out something with the teacher and once he completed the course, he no longer had to go back to the class. Now he's on to the next and flying through it as well. In fact, he finished it today. Yes, He just started that course a couple of weeks ago. Just a little story...When Rick had started the second class, he showed up and asked the teacher for the syllabus and his teacher chuckled to himself and said, "I can only give you maybe half the syllabus, seeing as I haven't finished it yet." So, there you have it, Rick actually caught up to his teacher and was waiting to hear from him for the rest of the syllabus.
I am most definitely bragging about my incredible husband!! How can I not? He's freaking awesome!! Mostly, I am just incredibly proud of him. I always knew I married a smart man, but not a genius! He he!! I just wish he didn't push himself so hard sometimes. I don't think there are too many women who could say that about their men...but I most definitely can. Three cheers for Rick!!! He makes me happy as usual and I just love talking him Up!
As for me, I am surviving. I am adjusting constantly. Lizzie is a bit of a mystery, even to herself right now. She doesn't even seem to know what she wants half the time and I'm... well, I'm having a GRAND old time trying to figure it out for her. It keeps me learning and trying new learning techniques and disciplinary techniques... constantly. I wish I could say it's refreshing and exhilarating, but I think I would have to use the words...exhausting and trying, some days.
But to go along with that.. I can't help LOVING being mommy. I do love it! It's fulfilling and gratifying in ways that only other mommy's can understand. I have the greatest opportunities now to teach her the right things. It's those things that will shape her and prepare her for the harder decisions she will have to face someday. Just saying that brings tears to my eyes. The last thing I want is for my, not so baby girl, to have to make big tough decisions that may cause her heart break and sorrow but I have to remember that she can learn from those things as well and be stronger because of them. Oh boy!!! Am I in for a lot of heart-wrenching agony as I am forced to watch and cheer from the sidelines. So, now is critical and I fear I am falling short of my mothering responsibilities. It's nice to know that Faith and Trust in the Lord can go a long way.
There is not a single doubt in my mind that He is making up for when we do fall short. If we are believing of it, He most definitely Is. I also know that there are angels watching over each one of us and they are most definitely cheering from the sidelines. What a relief!
The End :)
4 comments:
DITO!!! We are feeling so much of the same things. My hat is off to you both for all that you do. You guys are such a great team! So much will come from the work you are doing right now. All my love!!
Your hopeful spirit is contagious! I KNOW you can weather this--I know you won't always feel this way and because you are humble, you will emerge with new strength you can't even fathom.
Love you.
Oh Shay! I'm cheering for you from the the sidelines! Even if it is from all the way down here. You are an amazing person and I know that amazing and wonderful things are in store for you and your family. I am planning a trip up and an extra bit of a day to spend with you! JUST YOU! (and maybe our cute babies) I love you sooooo much Shay! I am constantly praying for you and your family and your happiness! Keep your head up kid!
Best post ever! --even though there were no pictures of Lizzy. :(
How could I not love this post about my amazing brother? I am so glad that you love him like you do. I know I say this all the time, but he is one of the best men I have ever known. :) You guys are so great together! I love that, even though we are so far away, I can feel close to you through your sweet words. I am missing you like crazy, but we both have to do what we have to do. And it sounds like you are doing a perfect job. (P.S. raising kids is supposed to be hard! If it's easy, then you're doing something wrong.)
I love you sister!
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